Obligation

I was thinking today about how nice it would be to always do what you wanted. I don't necessarily mean this in the selfish way so much as the way of feeling and following. When you feel like eating you eat and when you feel full you stop. When you have the urge to expend energy you go run or workout, and when you feel like being lazy you chill. A life of balance sort of thing. Non of the silly 'I know I shouldn't so I'll be super aware about it, obsess and stress out.' I don't know if this makes much sense, but I've been hanging out with someone who seems to live like that way more than me, and I was jelouse. Actually. I wished I could just let go more I guess, just relax more and do what I really want. I suppose I am getting closer and closer to this part of me, but I am still very far away.

The Next Step

I was very temporarily considering going straight to BA in Kendall after management, but there is no reason to do that especially when I still need an internship for Les Roches. I also think that the place I want to do my internship would be really good for me to bring more balance to my self. It is called The Farm and it is about 2 hours out of Manila in the Philippines. Probably the more ideal place for me to do my internship. It embodies everything I ever imagined in a health resort. The only thing that makes me second guess my draw is the fact that I would not be using any of my languages. South and Central America are th emore logical choices in that respect, but I keep coming back to The Farm. It is the best, though, of all the health resorts, and I know I would learn SO much there. It is Raw Vegan only, rustic housing, certified health professionals with a focus on balancing the mind and body. Yoga is a big thing as is fitness generally. I am doing that silly thing where I worry so much that they won't take interns that I haven't even taken the first step. As much as I want to get paid, this is one of the few places I would be very willing to work without pay. I won't tell them that of course, not initially anyway ;) I suppose I should not hesitate, and should just have a really good cover letter written and send it out. At least then I would know early on and would be able to find somewhere else. It is so perfect though.....

Otherwise

The end is near and I can feel it. 4 days until I begin my long journey back to the back to the States. I am so excited to see everyone again. 4 exams, one presentation, and a day of kitchen left. I still need ot move all of my stuff onto my apartment. I'm not exactly sure how I am going to do that still...